Getting In Your Own Way

Our beliefs can keep us from achieving what we want to achieve.  How many times do you say to yourself: 

Ø      I won’t be able to do that

Ø      People like me don’t make it

Ø      I didn’t get a degree so I’m not intelligent enough to….. 

Our thoughts prevent us from getting where we want to be.  These self-limiting beliefs are just that – beliefs.  However, we act as if they are facts and live our lives by them.   

Other beliefs include things like: 

Ø      If I enjoy myself today something awful will happen

Ø      I can’t do that until I’ve done ……. (e.g. all the work)

Ø      I tried that before and it didn’t work then and so I won’t bother again

Ø      I did succeed in doing………… but it wasn’t worth it

Ø      I did get there but now I see I that I need to be moving on to the next goal (the outcome of which is dissatisfaction) 

These beliefs are all part of our script.  The “script” in Transactional Analysis occurs when we make decisions when young, based on limited life experience, and live our lives accordingly.   

So, if you want to progress and experience being stuck, explore your beliefs about success.  Are you allowed to be successful?  What is success to you?  According to other people are you already successful but you don’t feel it?  What do you believe would happen if you became successful?  Are you “allowed” to be happy and successful?  What are you discounting that reinforces your belief that you’re not, or can’t be, successful?  What do you need to account that would help you shift your self-limiting beliefs?  (You may need to ask people who know you about this one!). 

Get in touch and share how changing your beliefs about self, others and life, has helped you move forward and own your success.

Buy our book today direct from our website, Amazon or Gower:  Working Together, Organizational Transactional Analysis and Business Performance.  There’s a free download chapter on our website:  www.mountain-associates.co.uk  Come to our guest workshop on Managing & Using Emotions in Organisations on 19 April, 2012, with Olivier Montadat from Paris and our next Developmental/Organisational TA module in May on The Politics of Attachment.  See our website for further information.

Lifting Your Limits in 2012*

Most of us never achieve our true potential because we have self-limiting beliefs which we treat as a fact.  These beliefs then influence the way we relate with others and the work we do and the way we do it.  We may have had dreams and ideas about what we would like to do but think that “people like us” can’t do things like “that”. 

These beliefs will affect our leadership styles, how we work with other people and how we express our opinions – or not as the case might be. 

Check out what you believe about yourself, others and life: 

Ø      Have you been acting as if these are facts when they are really beliefs? 

Ø      What effect has this been having on your life, including the job you do, and how you do it, the relationships you have and how you are within those? 

Ø      What will you believe instead?

Ø      What difference will this make in your life? 

Ø      What do you need to do to reinforce this new belief? 

Ø      From whom do you need support? 

Ø      When will you ask them for this support?

Ø      What will you do if you forget and go down the old pathway?

Ø      What will you do to reinforce this new belief?

Ø      How will you know when this new belief is really cemented in?

Ø      How will you celebrate your changes? 

Enjoy 2012 and think big, because we all need to shoot for the stars so that even if we miss we’ll get the moon!  Put out your intention and lift your limits*.

*Lifting Your Limits is a programme created by four of us, two consultant clinical psychologists and two Transactional Analysts.  To enquire about this course contact: ta@mountain-associates.co.uk  In the meantime read out book:  Working Together, Organizational Transactional Analysis and Business Performance, published by Gower and available from them as well as Amazon. Or come on our next Official Introducation to TA.