Be Yourself

Many of the people I coach come because they experience difficulties in relating to others, or to specific kinds of people. Mostly the issue is us - our attitude, our frame of reference about ourselves, others and life. Even if other people are experienced as "difficult" by a range of other people it is still up to us how we respond. If we believe that we are as good as anyone else then, even when under stress, we can find ways to keep ourselves okay. For example, there are often people whose only way of feeling okay is to put someone else down and attempt to sabotage any progress or success others are having. If we lose our grip at these times then we are likely to spiral downwards.

In order to deal with sabotaging behaviour, negativity and put-downs you need to talk to yourself positively. If you don't have sufficient strength in your Structuring Modes of behaviour (see our website on OK Modes to understand this further) then consider what someone else you respect might say. This will help you to stay Mindful (in the present moment) and take the appropriate steps. If you need to relate with this person then how you respond will be different to if you don't. If you should fall into the hole of making yourself not OK then you are giving your power away and agreeing with the other person's manipulative behaviour. Remaining in the here-and-now means that you will have more thinking available and there are ways in which you can deal with people that keep them okay but also set and maintain boundaries. This will also be of assistance to keep yourself feeling okay, despite the difficulties you are experiencing.

For more information on working with others, including issues of bullying, conflict and stress, then buy our book "Working Together: Organizational Transactional Analysis and Business Performance" published by Gower and also available on Amazon. Free downloadable chapter available on our website: www.mountain-associates.co.uk

If you resonate with this blog and are ready to overcome workplace challenges and create a breakthrough in your work environment, I would love to support you. Contact me now for your complimentary Workplace Breakthrough coaching session: +44 (0) 1455 824475; or email us: ta@mountain-associates.co.uk   Talk to you soon.